Baby grabbed the forbidden thing…

… which was actually for his father. Once the stranger sneakily put it within the baby’s reach, lo and behold, he handed it to his father; as couldn’t be otherwise from the fact that daddy-boy had been asserting his ownership of it for the last half hour in a pretty non-gentle manner.

You see, children only try to do forbidden things because the way parents enact the prohibition is moral in nature – not practical. It is hard to imagine that some sunglasses, or the house keys – let alone dangerous things – warrant a punishment that is moral in nature, and that make the child eventually internalise the message that he is bad.

bad-child-400x198This is why the child repeats the behaviour. His intention is good, or playful, or whatever; and he is not bad. Therefore, something with this situation in his relationship to his father must be resolved; and it is very important, obviously, since it is people’s moral nature that is to be established.

The lack of resolution then settles in his young nervous system as a compulsion; maybe not around this object in particular but about forbidden things… Does this sound familiar to you, adult?

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